Some negotiations are harder than others. That’s just the way it is.
When the stakes are highest, nobody rises to the occasion. Instead, we all fall to our highest level of preparation.
As Miguel de Cervantes once wrote: "To be prepared is half the victory." Next time you find yourself in a challenging negotiation, use these three tactics to make it rain.
Before sitting down at the table, you need to mentally prepare and ensure your mindset is ideal for a difficult conversation.
To do that, we recommend using the C.A.V.I.AA.R™ method, which involves remembering to stay curious, accepting that you will be attacked, and venting before you enter a negotiation.
If you don’t vent before you sit down at the table, all of the negative sentiments in your head—maybe you were running late or have been dealing with personal issues—will be top of mind. Should that happen, half of your brain would be offline because you’ll be thinking about all those negative sentiments.
For the best outcomes, you need to be 100 percent committed to the conversation. You need to listen at the highest level and fully dial into what the other side says. The better you listen, the easier it will be to make your ask.
Ahead of the negotiation, use our Negotiation One Sheet to prepare. Come up with six Accusation Audits™, five Asking Labels™, four what questions, three how questions, two No-Oriented Questions™, and one Proof of Life™ question.
That last one is particularly important. For example, ask something like this: Out of all the other people in this industry, why did you choose us? The other side will either respond with your value proposition or express hesitation. If they say tons of good stuff about your business, there’s a deal to be had.
You also need to use a Summary™ during the negotiation. When you can thoroughly summarize the discussion, you ensure everyone is on the same page. You’ll know this is the case when your counterpart says these two magical words: ”That’s Right”™.
If you’re a parent, you’ve probably said this to your kids at some point: Why did you do that?
None of us realize how dumb we make our kids when we holler at them like that. Their amygdala freezes, and they cannot think clearly. When you use the wrong tone of voice in a negotiation, you have the same impact on your counterpart.
When you’re in a challenging negotiation, you need to remain calm. If you become flustered, calm yourself down. Otherwise, your tone will come across as brash. Because tone is one of the first things your counterpart will recognize about you, use a proper tone or risk giving the other side an unfavorable first impression of you—making a deal that much harder.
No matter where you’re negotiating—whether in China, South Africa, or the Bahamas—human nature is the same. When the other side gets triggered, they will respond the same way no matter what.
By entering a negotiation with a proper mindset, coming to the table prepared, and ensuring you use the right tone of voice, it becomes that much easier to make a deal. On the flip side, if you rush into a negotiation without preparation, it’s impossible to get the best outcomes.
You can continue to prepare for your next negotiation by learning how to negotiate with challenging counterparts in our E-Book, 5 Negotiation Tactics for Dealing with Difficult People.